To my pregnant friends and acquaintances on Facebook:
FYI I'm infertile. Haven't exactly put that out there in my status updates, but I am. And, yes, I'm probably jealous that you are pregnant, but that doesn't mean that I'm unable to be happy for you. I would love to share in your joy. Although probably not at your baby shower (unless you're one of those very near & dear to my heart); it's too hard on my husband when I come home in tears and end up spending another Saturday night watching "Julie & Julia" or "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." However happy I am for you, there are a few things you should be aware of.
I may be a teensy bit sensitive seeing as the hubs and I are out over 30k and all we have to show for it are a few expensive periods, but I don't want to hear about the intensity/frequency of your progesterone-induced nausea/vomiting. Even hinting at a change in your bowel movements is not appropriate talk on the ol' FB, never mind that my FSH is closer to 20 than 10. If you want to do it under a name like "mommy2b," feel free. But having your date of birth, place of employment, and favorite movies beside a comment like "50% effaced!!!" is a little much.
When you post "these pregnancy hormones are awful," realize that it takes a lot of emotional energy to refrain from responding "how about ovarian hyperstimulation followed by transvaginal progesterone thrice daily and then not getting pregnant!" And my stores of emotional energy have been drained pretty low in the past nearly 2 and a half years of trying to get pregnant. Please stop tempting me.
Posting your positive home pregnancy test pee stick as your new profile picture may be cute to some, but I find it, again, a bit much. Perhaps because it felt like I'd gotten kicked in the abdomen. A classy post about your new addition is wonderful and I will probably "like" your status. Pee stick profile pics almost guarantee I will have to "hide" you from my news feed for the next 40 weeks because, frankly, if you're posting a pee stick, then god knows what else will come up.
Please consider limiting your pregnancy complaints on FB. It's amazing and scary what your body is going through, and you deserve to vent about your changing body and bodily functions. But doing so via FB on a regular basis makes me want to scratch your eyes out. Plus I know I'm not the only one who finds it gauche. Know that for every pregnancy complaint, one of my hairs turns grey and kind of kinky. Help me out here.
Best,
Babylessinbaltimore
Amen, sister!!!
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